When Authors come to town.
by blargblarg
Summary: Holy Crap!!! It's been awhile, hasn't it? Anyways, here ya go!
1. Author Intro

This is probably gonna be stupid, but read on. Please no flames.  
  
The Great Zelda Nerf War!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Zelda , or Hasbro Inc.  
  
The Zelda characters are sitting around, and are playing twister.  
  
Link: Okay, Right hand yellow.  
  
POOF!  
  
In a cloud of smokey stuff, 2 dark figures are standing.  
  
Link: It's Johnny law! Let's beat it!  
  
Everyone laughs  
  
Voices from inside smoke: Silence!  
  
Ruto: Who are you guys?  
  
Voice 1: Introducing, rookie author, Jskater!  
  
Jskater walks out, with a Big ol' Nerf gun in his hand.  
  
Jskater: W'sup?  
  
Zelda: Who's the other person in there?  
  
Jskater: whoops, forgot about her.  
  
Saria: Her? Please god, don't let it be Misty Dawn!  
  
Jskater: oh come on, her stories aren't THAT bad. And plus, it's not Misty Dawn.  
  
Her name is KitKat.  
  
Mido: I can't believe it's not misty dawn! :D  
  
KitKat walks out, with a nerf gun in each hand, and the smoke disappears.  
  
KitKat: Any1 here like nerf guns?  
  
Link: actually, I have a fear of nerf guns. One time I got shot in the face while riding Epona. (read my bloopers to find out what happened)  
  
Jskater: and, your point is?  
  
Link: Nevermind.  
  
Everyone else says they like nerf guns.  
  
KitKat: Cool! We're gonna have a nerf war!  
  
Everyone: YAYZ!  
  
Jskater points at the ground, and a bunch of nerf guns and ammo packs appear.  
  
Jskater: I have made a list of teams. Here it is.  
  
Jskater + KitKat  
  
Saria + Ruto  
  
Link + Malon  
  
Malon: YES!  
  
Darunia + Rauru  
  
Mido + Skull kid  
  
Ganon + Nabooru  
  
Impa + Zelda  
  
Jskater: Okay nerfers, pick your weapon.  
  
Everyone picks his/her weapon, and grabs 2 ammo sashes (like in Rambo).  
  
Okay, First 3 teams to 1000 points wins. Head shot: 25 points, torso: 5 points,  
  
limbs: 30 points.  
  
Okay nerfers, let's do this!!!!!!!  
  
They all appear in a big nerf arena, and a clock starts to count down.  
  
  
  
10...  
  
9...  
  
8..  
  
7..  
  
6..  
  
5..  
  
4..  
  
3..  
  
2..  
  
1..  
  
  
  
See what happens next chapter!  
  
  
  
R/R!!!!!!! 


	2. Let the nerfing begin!

I DON'T OWN ZELDA!!!!  
  
But here's The great Zelda nerf war! Part 2!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
GO!  
  
Everyone runs to different spots, while firing darts at each other. Link fires 2 darts at Jskater, who dodges them, and rapid fires 5 darts at him.  
  
Link: Damn!  
  
KitKat: Chomp on this! *fires a dart at Malon, and hits her quare in the forehead*  
  
Jskater: there's a rule that if a dart sticks to you, u can't take it off until the end of the match!  
  
KitKat: BOOYAH!!!  
  
Lets check up on Saria and Ruto, shall we?  
  
*Mido is peppering Ruto with darts, and because she's always kinda wet, they sting*  
  
Ruto: OW!!!! THOSE HURT!  
  
Saria: Hey Mido!  
  
Mido: Ya?  
  
Saria: Will you go out with me?  
  
*mido's mouth drops open, and he just stands there*  
  
Saria: PSYCHE! *Starts to bombard him with wet darts, compliments of Ruto)  
  
Skull Kid: MIDO, SNAP OUT OF IT! YOUR GIVING THEM POINTS!  
  
Mido: *Snaps back* Huh? AHH! Run skull kid!  
  
Checking on Gannon and Nabby  
  
*They're shooting at Impa and Zelda, and Zelda obviously has a great aim*  
  
Zelda: Take this GannonDORK! *She shoots, and hits Gannon in the eye*  
  
Ganny: OW! *Falls over, while Impa and Zelda keep peppering him with darts*  
  
*All of a sudden, a tiny foam ball goes down Nabby's shirt*  
  
Nabby: HEY! *she hears some giggling, and a loud slap noise*  
  
Voice: ow Kit! What was that for?  
  
Nabby: ggggggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrr......JSKATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
KitKat: Oh crap. Jskater, RUN!!!!!!!  
  
*Jskater is running from nabby, and shoots over his shoulder, and hits nabby in the eye, without aiming*  
  
Nabby: You knocked out my contact lens!!!!!!!!!  
  
*KitKat and Jskater run off, just to find Rauru and Darunia, who have HUGE guns*  
  
J & K : OH CRAP!!!!!  
  
*Rauru and Darunia start firing at J & K, but they start doing the limbo matrix thing*  
  
Rauru: Aww man, I'm out of ammo!  
  
Darunia: Me too!  
  
*A loud RAPATAPATAPATAPA noise is heard, and we see Darunia And Rauru on the ground covered in darts*  
  
A loud voice: CEASE FIRE!  
  
Everyone stops, and are told the final standings.  
  
1st: a tie between Jskater and KitKat, and Zelda and Impa  
  
2nd: Link And Malon  
  
3rd: Saria and Ruto  
  
Nabby: Jskater should have points deducted because he shot a ball down my shirt!  
  
Jskater: So? It was funny! *gets another slap from KitKat*  
  
Jskater: Okay time to end the chapter! What will we do next time? Will Nabby ever forgive me? find out next time!  
  
  
  
R & R!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


	3. Short but stupid Videos

Here's Chapter 3 of " When authors come to town"!!!!!  
  
Disclaimer: Yet again, Neither me nor KitKat own zelda.  
  
  
  
Jskater: What do you want to do?  
  
Link: I dunno.  
  
Malon: lets go um. do.. something.  
  
KitKat: oh THAT's helpful.  
  
Rauru: hey. I got some home videos.  
  
Jskater: O.ó hehehehehe..  
  
Everyone : MO! Wait. NO!  
  
Nabby: I'm still angry.  
  
Jskater: so?  
  
Link: yeah. So?  
  
Nabby: SO I'm gonna slap BOTH of you.  
  
Rauru: but u already did something bad to Jskater.  
  
Nabby: O.O! uh-oh..  
  
Jskater: WHAT did you do?  
  
Nabby: um.. Nothing?  
  
Rauru: I beg to differ. Lets go to the tape!  
  
Rauru pops in the tape, and we see Nabby open a secret wall in her room, and in side are posters of Jskater.  
  
Everyone: What the ..  
  
Jskater: AAAAAAUUUUUGGGHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
KitKat: Nabby, he's taken.  
  
Nabby: by who...?  
  
KitKat: me.  
  
KitKat whispering to Jskater: I'm just saying that so she'll leave u alone.  
  
Jskater: oh, ok.  
  
KitKat: well, what are we gonna do?  
  
Link: weren't we gonna watch the video?  
  
KitKat: oh yes.  
  
  
  
Video # 1: Link.  
  
*link is jumping off a diving board.*  
  
All girls except Kitkat: SWOON  
  
Jskater: Man link, you got the ladies crawling on u!  
  
Link: that can be a bad thing. Believe me.  
  
  
  
Video 2: Jskater.  
  
*He's skateboarding, and is busting some sweet tricks.*  
  
Jskater: I didn't know I looked THAT cool skateboarding.  
  
  
  
Video 3: Rauru.  
  
*is pulling darts off him, and raiding the fridge at the same time.*  
  
I. good pizza.  
  
*takes a bite out of Jskater's Skateboard*  
  
Jskater: HEY! That deck cost me $50!!!!!!  
  
  
  
All of a sudden, Rauru eats the videos.  
  
Everyone except Nabby: RAURU!  
  
Everyone starts to shoot Rauru with nerf darts, except Nabby who is pelting Jskater with darts  
  
  
  
  
  
Jskater: Well, there's chapter 3!!!!  
  
HEY! YEAH I'M TALKING TO U! REVIEW! 


	4. Nabby gets what she wants

Ch 4!!!!  
  
When authors come to town!  
  
Disclaimer: we don't own Zelda!!!  
  
  
  
  
  
*Everyone's watching rush hour 2 on a couch when Nabby comes in*  
  
Nabby: Hey KitKat, I saw Jskater flirting with Zelda this morning.  
  
KitKat: So? I Don't care.  
  
Nabby: HAH!  
  
KitKat: O__O! Jskater?  
  
Jskater: Ya?  
  
KitKat: Our cover's blown. In layman's terms: run.  
  
Nabby: Hey Jskater.....  
  
Jskater: EEP! *Runs away, and locks himself in the bathroom* I have thwarted you evil plans!!!!  
  
Everyone except Nabby: HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH!  
  
*Jskater open the door a little bit when Nabby wasn't looking, and shoots her in the head with a nerf dart*  
  
Nabby: GGGRRRRRR.  
  
*Nabby catches the door just before he closes it, and finds a leg and shoe going up into the air vent*  
  
Nabby: Come back down here!  
  
Jskater: (sounding like a 7 year old) no!  
  
Nabby: I'm gonna get you little b#^%$^!d  
  
Jskater: Ooooh. Big words, puff-pants. =Þ  
  
Nabby: *Tries to enter vent, but fails miserably due to the size of her pants*  
  
*she goes and watches the movie*  
  
Nabby: he has to come out sometime.  
  
  
  
Checking on Jskater is doing.  
  
  
  
*He makes his way to a room, and gets out, only to find that he's in Nabby's "Secret room"*  
  
Jskater: OH CRAP!!!!!  
  
Nabby (still watching the movie): wuzzat?  
  
Jskater: EEK!  
  
Nabby: oh, this is gonna be gooood.  
  
Jskater: I thought my first kiss would be enjoyable...  
  
Nabby: oh it will be, it will...  
  
*Jskater tries to scream, but can't because his mouth is covered (you know what I mean)*  
  
KitKat: Holy cheeseburgers! Whats going on in there? *winces as the thought comes to her* I'll get the mouthwash!  
  
*Jskater walks out, and flops over onto the couch*  
  
Jskater: whud I mith?  
  
KitKat:This one guy shot this other guy, There's the dead guy!!!!  
  
Jskater: then why's he driving a forklift?  
  
KitKat: oops, wrong guy. Want some mouthwash?  
  
Jskater: Is it mint?  
  
KitKat: um, yeah, why?  
  
Jskater: I'd like to have some cinnamon after an hour of minty freshness  
  
KitKat: ok. Here ya go.  
  
Jskater: THANK YOU!!!!  
  
Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle  
  
Did I mention Gurgle?  
  
KitKat: WOULD YOU SHUT UP!?!?!?  
  
Jskater: *spits* ahh.. Sure.  
  
*Nabby comes out, looking pretty happy*  
  
Nabby: want to do that again?  
  
Jskater: HELL NO!  
  
Nabby: Why not?  
  
Jskater: oh I don't know.. FOR OBVIOUS REASONS?!?!?!?  
  
Zelda: what about me?  
  
Jskater: sure.  
  
*Jskater goes and sits really close to zelda*  
  
Nabby: ( poo.  
  
JSkater: What will we do next chapter? Will nabby finally quit her little "Jskater hunt" (probably not)? Find out next chapter!  
  
  
  
HEY! YEAH I'M TALKING TO YOU! REVIEW! 


	5. It's been awhile!

Sorry for the wait, I've been too busy Nerfing!!!!.  
  
Anywho, here's chapter five!  
  
Disclaimer: FOR THE LAST TIME! We DON'T OWN ZELDA!!!!  
  
  
  
*Jskater and Zelda are playing Mario Kart on their GBA's*  
  
Jskater: Aww man! I lost again!  
  
Zelda: Oh yeah! Booyah!  
  
Jskater: you want something to drink?  
  
Zelda: pepsi's fine.  
  
Jskater: 'kay.  
  
*Jskater walks to the kitchen, but gets tackled by Nabby*  
  
Nabby: HAH! You thought That going out with Zelda would stop me from trying to "get you"?  
  
Jskater: damn! I thought it was working.  
  
*KitKat walks in, and sees the commotion*  
  
Jskater: ~help~  
  
Zelda: Don't worry Kit, I'll help him.  
  
*Zelda walks over, and pops Nabby's pants*  
  
Nabby: GRRRRRRRRRRRRR! ! !  
  
*As Nabby is about to pummel Zelda, when Jskater smears Lipstick all over Nabby's face *  
  
Nabby: Must.....go.....wash......off....LIPSTICK!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*Nabby runs off*  
  
J&Z: Yay!  
  
Jskater: I think I'll keep this with me for protection. *pockets lipstick*  
  
KitKat: who wants to go to the ARCADE?  
  
Everyone: ME!  
  
*we hear a faint "yay!" from Nabby's bathroom*  
  
Link: Then lets go!  
  
Zelda: I'll Drive!  
  
*everyone gets in the car*  
  
Jskater: Who wants to trade me seats?  
  
*no one answers*  
  
Nabby: good. *sits by Jskater*  
  
Jskater: make one bad move, and your face gets it! *holds lipstick menacingly*  
  
Nabby: *whimpers*  
  
*they arrive at the arcade, and get their tokens*  
  
Link: LOOKIT ALL THE GAMES!!!!!  
  
Jskater and Link: SWEET!!!!!!  
  
*Nabby is playing a crane game, and is failing miserably.*  
  
Nabby: GOD DAMMIT!  
  
*Jskater is next to her, on one of those crane games that have watches and other shiny stuff in them, and is cleaning out the machine*  
  
Jskater: Oooh! Pretty watch. WOW! A LASER POINTER! ANOTHER ONE!  
  
Link: DUDE! Can I have one?  
  
Jskater: If I can get one more for Zelda, then yes.  
  
Link: Schweeeeeet.  
  
Jskater: Whoa! I just got 2 more!  
  
Jskater: Yo! KitKat!  
  
KitKat: What? Dude, you made me die.  
  
Jskater: whoops. Anyway, catch!  
  
*Jskater Chucks a laser pointer to KitKat*  
  
Link: Hey Jskater, they have Metal Slug X!!!!  
  
*Jskater pockets the lasers, and goes over to the game*  
  
Jskater: Damn, I need bigger pockets.  
  
::20 Minutes Later::  
  
KitKat: Okay everybody, we gotta go!  
  
*As Everyone leaves, the crane game stockboy comes in and re-fills the crane games*  
  
::In The Car::  
  
Nabby: How the hell is it 11 o'clock?  
  
Jskater: It just is! Now be quiet! Zelda's trying to sleep.  
  
::At The House::  
  
KitKat: G'night everybody!  
  
Nabby: GODDAMMIT JSKATER!!! QUIT SHINING THAT LASER POINTER AT ME!!!!  
  
Jskater: *whistles* 


End file.
